Written by Tammy Machmali
Ever heard of this magical companion we all carry within – the inner child? It's like this tiny guardian dwelling in our subconscious from the very moment we started our journey in our mother's womb. This little friend stays with us through all the stages of life – from babyhood to adulthood and beyond.
Now, this inner child is not just a silent spectator; it's a repository of our childhood fears, joys, traumas, and dreams. Picture this: the fear when your mom left you on the first day of school, the loneliness in a sea of classmates, the shame of not answering a tricky question. Your inner child holds onto all of that, and more.
Our inner child is like the keeper of innocence, awe, wonder, joy, playfulness, and sensitivity. But as we grow older, we're often taught to stifle, ignore, or even bury this little self. And that's when the real struggle with life begins. We mistakenly believe we've outgrown our inner child and left it behind with the emotional baggage of the past. But truth be told, that's rarely the case.
A Child in an Adult’s Frame
Imagine a five-year-old navigating the complexities of adulthood. Picture the angry, hurt, fearful little boy or girl trying to make grown-up decisions or handle adult relationships. It's a bit like expecting a child to lead an independent life or pursue a career. No wonder relationships crumble, and we find ourselves feeling anxious, insecure, and afraid. It might sound a bit like multiple personality disorder, but it's a common struggle that often goes unnoticed.
So, what's the remedy? It's to heal this inner child.
What Research Reveals about the Inner Child
In a groundbreaking study conducted by the Center for Emotional Wellness, researchers explored the profound effects of inner child healing on mental well-being. Spanning across age groups from 30 to 60, participants who actively embraced inner child healing reported remarkable enhancements in life satisfaction and emotional resilience. The study underscored the enduring influence of early life experiences on adult personality traits and coping mechanisms, revealing how childhood events continued to shape decisions, relationships, and self-perception. Moreover, the research illuminated a crucial link between suppressed inner child emotions and psychological distress in adulthood, with therapeutic practices leading to a notable reduction in anxiety and depression symptoms. Psychologists advocating for this approach emphasized the therapeutic potential of integrating creative modalities, such as art, music, and writing, into the healing process, recognizing them as potent tools for accessing and releasing deeply rooted emotions tied to the inner child. Ultimately, the study revealed the transformative power of inner child healing, advocating for its incorporation into mental health practices to foster resilience and fulfillment in adulthood.
What if the Inner Child Is Left Unhealed?
Ignoring those aching hurts from the past can lead to destructive behaviors. It might manifest subtly as self-sabotage – procrastination, overeating, or seeking solace in substances. Unhealed inner child wounds can also result in sleep difficulties, lack of focus, workaholism, racism, and alcoholism. The adult carrying an unhealed inner child might display impulsive, sulky behaviors or even throw narcissistic temper tantrums. The constant seeking of attention becomes a silent plea, driven by the fear of abandonment.
The Transformative Power of Healing the Inner Child
Healing this inner child is like a reset button for your entire existence. It creates a cocoon of safety and security that your younger self always yearned for, allowing the positive aspects of your inner child to shine. By healing, you unlock your natural gifts – curiosity, boundless capacity to love, enhanced creativity, improved health, and a fulfilling life.
"But I'm old; I don't need inner child healing," you might say. Well, before you make that declaration, ask yourself: Do you often talk down to yourself? Do you curse yourself for missed opportunities? Do you trust yourself? Do you harbor a negative perception of the person you believe you are? If the answer is yes, those are signs that your inner child is wounded and in need of healing. And remember, it's never too late to care for the inner child within, and consequently, for your adult self.
“The cry we hear from deep in our hearts, comes from the wounded child within. Healing this inner child’s pain is the key healingto transforming anger, sadness, and fear. ”
Healing Your Inner Child Through Creativity
As adults, we often react to life through the lens of our inner child. Our busy lives with bills, responsibilities, and little time for fun tend to stifle the childlike qualities within us. When was the last time we embraced spontaneity and passion? The repression over the years has led to negative life patterns in our choices. But fear not, through creativity, we can tap into these emotions and heal our inner child.
How to Begin the Healing with Creativity
Step 1: Ditch the Judgment
Enough with the self-judgment! What will they think of me? What if my drawing or painting isn't perfect? As adults, we're overly concerned with others' opinions, a trait inherited from our childhood perception of the world. It's time to let go. Be gentle with yourself. Allow that inner child to breathe. Your creative expression doesn't have to be flawless; let it flow as naturally as a child's creation.
Step 2: Experiment with Different Forms of Creativity
Let's embrace various forms of creativity – singing, photography, painting, acting, cooking, you name it! Explore different mediums – crayons, oil pastels, watercolors, etc. Let your inner child guide you without overthinking.
Step 3: Dive into Emotions
Which colors tug at your heartstrings? Stay in the moment and listen to your feelings. Don't worry about the final result; just go with the flow. Feel the paint touch the paper, embrace the texture it creates, and lose yourself in the meditative movement of your brush. What emotions arise? What does each color feel like? Immerse yourself in this world of colors, reaching the deeper feelings of your inner child and initiating the healing process.
Since we're starting 2024, I wanted to talk about something close to my heart, a journey many of us might need to take: healing our inner child. If you want to move faster and without baggage into 2024, there's no better way than diving into the first thing that hinders our efforts. When we have clarity and an empty mind, we can move forward, and being in sync with our inner child is the key. Listening and acknowledging this inner voice will help you create and do whatever you want without feeling stuck and anxious. Since you are one with your inner child.
Now, I know it might sound a bit strange, but bear with me. Picture this – your inner child, that innocent, curious, and pure part of you that might have experienced a few bumps and bruises along the way. We all have one. And guess what? It's time to give that little version of you some much-needed tender loving care.
Think of your inner child as that tiny, wide-eyed version of yourself who believed in magic, danced in the rain just because it felt good, and laughed with unfiltered joy. Life happens, and sometimes it throws stuff at us that makes our inner child hide away, scared and wounded.
But here's the deal: healing that inner child can be a game-changer. It's like unlocking a treasure chest of self-love, resilience, and joy that you didn't even know you had.
So, where do we start? Here are a few simple actions that will make a huge difference:
Acknowledge the Little You:
Take a moment to reflect on your past. What were those moments that shaped you? The good, the bad, and the messy – they all played a role in creating the person you are today. It's okay to revisit those memories, but do it with compassion.
Embrace Vulnerability:
Vulnerability is not a weakness; it's a superpower. Let yourself feel, express, and acknowledge those emotions. It's like giving your inner child a safe space to speak up, to say, "Hey, that hurt," or "I didn't understand." Be gentle with yourself.
Nurture with Self-Compassion:
Imagine you're comforting a scared child – that's exactly what you need to do for yourself. Treat yourself with kindness, speak to yourself like you would to a friend in need. Shower yourself with the love and understanding you deserved then and deserve now.
Revisit Joyful Activities:
What made your heart sing when you were little? Was it drawing, dancing, playing with pets, or just daydreaming? Reconnect with those simple joys. Your inner child will thank you, and you'll find a renewed sense of happiness.
Set Boundaries:
As grown-ups, we often forget to set boundaries. Your inner child needs you to say no when it's necessary, to protect yourself from harm, and to prioritize your well-being. It's like being the superhero your little self always believed you could be.
Forgive, Including Yourself:
We all make mistakes; it's part of being human. Forgive those who might have hurt your inner child, and most importantly, forgive yourself. Free yourself from the chains of guilt or shame. You deserve it.
Remember, healing your inner child isn't a one-time thing; it's a continuous journey. Be patient with yourself, celebrate the progress, and know that every step you take is a step towards a more whole and healed you. And remember, you are worth the effort it takes to heal, grow, and become the best version of you.
Sending you all the love and light on your healing journey!
If you're curious to dive deeper into these strategies or share your thoughts, reach out to me contact. Let's make 2024 a year of unconditional love, courage and success, advancing toward your vision and goals one action at a time.
I'd love to help you get started: To assist you on this journey, I've prepared a Free workbook on 26 Ways to Release Mental & Emotional Baggage In Less Than 5 Minutes A day.
Wishing you a day filled with small steps towards a healthier, happier you!
My sincere hope is that you discover meaningful insights within these words, as many others have. If you have any questions or thoughts, please don't hesitate to contact me.
Stay connected for more content and updates by following me on Instagram @tammymachmali
